The rush for success can hurt your relationships badly. The universal definition of success is the accomplishment of an aim or purpose. No matter what you may achieve, it counts as success. From the beginning of time, men and women have been striving to achieve success, with or without the help of others. To a school of thought, it has, in this present stage been a massive competition, to others war, to achieve success in life. A famous writer Michael Bonnell once said that with a burning desire, there is nothing that cannot be achieved.
Talent wins games, but teamwork and intelligence win championships– Michael Jordan.
Yes! I agree and believe transferring these messages onto the young generation has been a great task, yet the wrong results are mainly experienced. Maybe, the problem is with the real deliverers of the message. Maybe they pass on these messages of encouragement wrongly. Or maybe, the receivers of these messages sense the feeling and misunderstand the whole concept of it.
The urge to acquire success
The competitive mindset toward success has created so much chaos in our world today. Self-centeredness, mindset to the competition! Has your urge to achieve success hurt your relationships? Have you felt like competing with others to win always? Have you ever considered these questions? Take a moment back to track back to your early education. Think back to your school time table, the homework, the tests, and the relentless pursuit of better grades and excellence. Did you achieve success?
The philosophy that “The brave will survive” has planted a sense of anger and undying desire to achieve success at all costs that it becomes easy to justify the means with the end thus success. One has to be brave enough to have the lion’s share yet you need to come out clean. We believe it doesn’t matter who or how we just need to get to the top and at the end of the day we will come back to make amendments. Avoid being the one always at the point of mercy.
Don’t compete, Cooperate!
A famous writer, Joshua David Stone once advised in his writings saying” Cooperate with others at all times; do not compete”. Success is an emotion. We strive for success because of the positive feeling that we associate with it. Nobody wants to be rich-but-miserable or famous but detested. When we imagine ourselves successful, we imagine ourselves happy. Note that the lives you are able to affect positively add up to your success. Imagine the pain you cause others on your way up by cheating, scamming, causing their dismissals at work will drive them away from you, and adds up to the people waiting in the elevator to see you come down too as they did.
3 Ways your success journey can hurt your relationships
Most people may be hurt during your strife for success when you:
- When you Fail to check your intentions
When you speak, do you intend to help, to inform, to encourage, to discourage, to support, or do you even know what your intent is? Exhibiting your commitment to carry out an activity should be positive and of good measure. It may be that you meant to do the right thing and never wanted to hurt anyone, nevertheless, the harm may be done. Remember that your intentions are measured by your actions.
- You Refuse to see that your perception of what hurts is not the same as others
During your strive, you need to identify the fact that you have no way to know a person’s history of pain or hurt even if you know some of the details. Knowing your audience is good. You dare not assume everyone is or will be comfortable with you or your choices. Being sensitive to your environment and adjusting to still achieve your goal makes you a mentor to be looked up to.
- The habit of excluding people
Researchers in the Journal Behavioral and Neural Evidence says that social rejection activates the same brain region as physical pain. Even among friends, turning your body to keep someone out of a conversation is a great way to hurt one’s feelings. Even in a classroom, a child may refuse or feel reluctant to go to school when he or she realizes his or her exemption in-class activities. This is basically due to the fact that the ward is feeling hurt and undermined. If there be a situation of exemption, you may inform the party involved.
The destruction you leave behind
Affecting people negatively during your journey to success will depend on what you define “success”. Let’s not forget that people rarely forget being trampled upon by others. The elevator going up goes far slower on the way up than the way down. Remember, if you do decide to trample on people, that when you get to the upper echelons of your chosen career – your fellow workers must be as cold-blooded as you and will “cut your career throat” as easily as you cut others.
Success leaves clues and wounds inflicted on others come back to hunt you
Friends and other relations who are hurt by your words and actions aim at nothing than to expect the worse happening to you in most situations. They may simply care less about what happens to you. Others may go to the extreme of ensuring a checkmate with you. Hurt People affected negatively by others on their quest to achieve success may or may not recover from the pain. Relations who quickly recover and pick up the pieces may have a strong recovery sense while others without this ability turn out to develop and exhibit anger, regret, isolation, mistrust, and sometimes very annalistic when dealing with issues due to fear of being misused again.
If not dealt with, it may go a long way toward affecting growth and productivity.